East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
