New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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