if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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