I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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