I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize