I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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