im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
