you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
