Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Randomize
