I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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