The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
