as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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