Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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