i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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