I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Too much gin, very little bucket
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Randomize
