it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
You were trust falling into bushes
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
