I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Randomize
