Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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