Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
