brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
