I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
