i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize