Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
