Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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