I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
i came on her dog
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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