she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
