what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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