I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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