why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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