just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
