You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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