Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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