yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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