no, he came in my armpit
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
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