do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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