my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
