i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
