glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
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