She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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