just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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