he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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