K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I deserve to be covered in dicks
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
