I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
