just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
