so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Randomize