i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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