loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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