Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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