My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I looked at my own cervix.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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