have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
